...is the first line from Simon & Garfunkel’s Sounds of Silence.
Back about 20 years ago I had tickets to see S&G somewhere in London but I got the flu or something and couldn’t go. At the time I thought I’d never get the chance to see them again because they were so old. In fairness they probably weren’t really that old but I was seeing it from the viewpoint of a 20-something boy and I say that because men are boys until they are at least 45 and sometimes 50, and sometimes it never happens...I know, madam, sadly it’s true.
Well, now S&G  are coming to Sydney in June and I managed to get tickets. They cost a motza, almost $400 can you believe!
They have this Ticketek system here where you don’t talk to anyone, you just key details in on the phone, realising at the last second that your credit card has been sucked with a similar skill and dexterity offered for free by those who skim your card at crooked ATMs. You get no option of which seat you want either.
Anyhow, I swallowed it because I want to see S&G on stage before I die...
Here’s the thing though; a week after opening ticket sales they were advertising it again.
Of course, back in the ‘60s I imagine an S&G gig was packed but now some of the regulars probably can’t go on account of hip and knee replacements and zimmer frames and wearing felt hats with a brim sitting on ears which look flapping huge as you’re following them in their 1982 Ford Granada Ghia X in gold with the nodding dog on the back parcel shelf and you’re thinking, Jesus Christ pull over and why does he grip the steering wheel – at the top – with such a tight on-the-edge-of-a-cliff grip. Maybe they can’t remember their own names let alone Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel, which let’s face it is a mouthful anyway, so perhaps there’s not a lot of demand for S&G tickets.
Well, knock me down with an electric buggy with a flag on it, now they’re advertising them at $70 a ticket! It’s making my blood boil. I mean those of us who paid almost $400 (well, maybe it’s only me...) are going to be in a right mood before it even kicks off. Frankly for that sort of money I expect to be taken out for dinner afterwards by Paul and Art, followed by a night on the town – or perhaps we’ll just go back to their hotel room for a hot chocolate and a bit of a lie down.