...then I'll begin.
As regular readers will recall, I've finished a book which was to be published end of January/February. Well, time is marching on and I know you are all sitting there humming quietly to yourselves, sitting on your hands, waiting for the big launch.
Surprise, surprise, I've been having some problems getting the printed copies out, the minutiae of which I will not bore you with because I know you are all busy folks, but what I've decided to do in the great tradition of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (he's that bloke wot wrote the Sherlock Holmes stories) is serialise the book, but instead of having you buy the London Illustrated News every week (which, you know, is difficult on account of the fact it went out of business about 1892) I've set up a website where I'll soon be posting chapters (oh I am a modern man, madam!) I'm thinking of posting a chapter a week but if you need it more regularly, as it were, I can do it twice a week - let's see how it goes...
Now, for those who simply cannot wait for the weekly dose of this blockbuster (more about the content in a minute) you can go here and for a paltry sum you can download it all. Frankly why anyone would want to do that I just don't know as you'll have to print out 300-plus pages but then if you have a job your employer will scarcely notice the reams of paper you are stuffing into your valise, so maybe some of you would like to do that...
Now, the book is called Gone and its tagline is: Have you ever thought of turning to crime? It's published under my pen name of King Coultas (any confusion with Stephen King is purely intentional you understand - you have to get sales where you can).
So, the book is set in England, France and Australia and is stuffed full of crime, guns, prison, sex, humour, sadness, romance, a death, a pornography expert who owns a brewery (now there's a vocation) and of course an interesting ending. Oh, did I mention - it's a true story.
Some of you who have been following my exploits via the blogging world will see some familiar bits, but read on because nowhere near all has been revealed, well not until now, and Gone is a story with a beginning, a middle and an end.
And why am I offering this literary marvel for free, I hear you call. Well, I want to try and keep you entertained but I've little spare time for blogging at the moment, on account of writing the next book (which is a thriller) and looking after Two and Four who not surprisingly want me all to themselves (whose genitals would they jump on first thing in the morning otherwise?).
Okay, I'll let you have the link to the Gone website in the next week, and hope you enjoy it.
25/02/08 @ 07:22